tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-79858903678267439362024-02-08T15:22:10.734+00:00Random OpinionPersonal rants of a middle aged IndianUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7985890367826743936.post-67072186867771868602014-01-23T08:55:00.001+00:002014-01-23T08:58:04.673+00:00Do Not Disturb–the spam epidemic in IndiaMost Indian service providers seem to believe that just because you bought services from them means they now have a license to spam you on your email address or cell phone.<br />
Anyway, for the last few weeks, I have been making a conscious effort to get myself off all these spam databases. Here has been my experience -<br />
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<b>Most mutual funds</b> – these guys seem to have the same service provider at the back end (looks like mailcenter.in). Fortunately, there is an unsubscribe link in every email. But here is the silliness – when you click on it, it takes you to a page where the unsubscribe action is confirmed with a message that the customer will get an email confirming it. Seriously? Didn’t I just tell you I don’t want any more emails from you?<br />
<b>Bajaj Allianz</b> – insisted that I hand over all the contacts where I am being “disturbed”. Plus also confirm if I am an existing customer. Fine, I did that. And when I clicked “confirm”, I get a message that their “executive” (I love these titles, only in India!) will contact me soon. Why? Am I not telling you to not contact me again unless its directly related to the policy you issued to me?<br />
<b>Reminders</b> – this is another favourite of almost all Indian service providers. The ones that really annoyed me recently have been Airtel and Apollo Munich. They both have systems that have no clue about payments already made. Apollo Munich was the worst, sending a reminder SMS every week even though I had paid the premium and had the receipt. The cherry on the cake was the automated reminder call from Apollo Munich a week before the due date. It was made around 9:40am which is fine but I was in London that day – so I woke up at 4am for a robot call and then got hit with the roaming bill. When I complained to Apollo Munich asking why their IT systems aren’t working (why can’t the payment system talk to the reminder setup?), the CSR seems to have only seen the word “IT” and responded saying there are no income tax benefits on the policy I hold. And this was followed by another email advising me to simply ignore the reminders. How do you ignore a telephone call in the middle of the night? Just brilliant!<br />
And don’t get me started on those who demand every bit of contact information to even give a quote. Yes, I am talking about you – ICICI Prudential, HDFC Life, policybazaar.com and many more. Why do you need my cellphone number and email address to give a quote online? Thank you Bajaj Allianz for not insisting on these details and still giving me a quote. There is a reason you still have my business, despite the poorly designed opt out page.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7985890367826743936.post-6077194266828754422014-01-15T20:56:00.001+00:002014-01-23T08:58:21.488+00:00Have we forgotten the simple pleasures in life?<br />
I am sitting in the lounge at London Heathrow right now, enjoying a leisurely dinner which will allow me to board and spend all the time on the flight sleeping. But that is not the focus of this post.<br />
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<a name='more'></a>There is a group of people sitting behind me, an older generation. About an hour back, they were chatting about the highlights of their Christmas holidays. One of the older gentlemen said that the highlight for him was getting a subscription for his Kindle allowing him to borrow electronic books for a small fee every month. That’s it. It wasn’t about the latest, super complicated smart phone. It wasn’t about jewellery bought as a gift. He didn’t talk about an extravagant holiday. All he was happy about was getting some books & magazines to read.<br />
Hearing him made me wonder – have we forgotten about the simpler pleasures in life? I remember being thrilled when the latest issue of Chandamama was delivered or waiting for the next episode of Fireball XL-5. But today, we seem to be more hung up about how much we can spend and show off rather than how much enjoyment we derive.<br />
Maybe I am wrong but then that’s my perspective.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7985890367826743936.post-30015216502056560502013-12-27T06:43:00.001+00:002013-12-27T07:50:18.067+00:00As seen… on Indian television<span style="font-size: small;">Here are some things I have seen -</span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;">1. Zee Café’s separator visual shows a certain part of the female anatomy in the “a” of the word café that normally attracts male attention. </span><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="color: white;"><span class="status">VNAWXUZV66F</span></span></span><br />
<a name='more'></a><span style="font-size: small;">Looks like I am not the only one who sees it, one guy actually </span><a href="http://youtu.be/dnfMPM3XJAE"><span style="font-size: small;">posted it on YouTube</span></a><span style="font-size: small;"> asking the same question.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;">2. Here is a </span><a href="http://www.google.com/images?q=engage+deo"><span style="font-size: small;">simple image search</span></a><span style="font-size: small;"> run on Google for Engage Deo, a new product from ITC. Again, am I seeing things or is the shape of the cans quite suggestive?</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;">3. While channel surfing on Christmas, here were the choices available at that particular time slot – Baalika Vadhu, Chhoti Bahu, Saas Bahu Aur Saazish and so on. And this was just on the Hindi channels. Is this genre the goose that lays golden eggs as far as Indian television goes? Or we have just run out of ideas?</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;">Let me know if I have a hyper active imagination or there is actually something subliminal going on.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="color: white;"><span class="status">R</span></span> </span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7985890367826743936.post-14521724225845536412013-12-25T01:21:00.000+00:002013-12-25T23:55:07.451+00:00Things, People and Stuff I can do without…2013 editionAs 2013 draws to a close, here is my perspective on various things, people, stuff I can do without (with a tip of the hat to <a href="http://www.terraquote.com/quote/6366/people-i-can-do-without-this-is-my/">George Carlin (RIP)</a>.<br />
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<b><i>Products endorsed by celebrities</i></b><br />
Are there people who actually think Kareena Kapoor uses an “iBall Andy” as her phone? And that Dhoni writes with some cheap ballpoint pen or rides a TVS bike? <br />
<a name='more'></a>These are like weight loss ads or late night infomercials – you never get the same results. In fact, most of the time, you won’t be even remotely close to what you saw in the ad. I think the “truth in advertising” needs to be enforced for all ads – either the celebrity in question should actually be seen using the product or they shouldn’t endorse it. Oh, and that includes not air brushing models to make them look even more unrealistically gorgeous (not that I am complaining!).<br />
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<b><i>Breaking news</i></b><br />
Seriously, what would happen if I am told about Hrithik Roshan’s separation from his wife after a few days? What will happen if I am not told what politicians utter? Do I really need to update my Linked In profile or Facebook wall (I don’t use Facebook) every time I go to the loo? Seriously, as a society, we need to ask how & when did we end up elevating the status of these things. On the flip side, if this is the most important news right now, then we should be grateful.<br />
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<b><i>Latest & greatest technology</i></b><br />
I am one of those odd people who still uses a BlackBerry. And I use it only for communicating with people via email, SMS, BBM or an old fashioned phone call (oh, the horror!). I think 4 different ways of communicating is quite enough, but looks like I am in a minority. Every time I think of buying the latest “smart” phone, I look at the price and wonder what I will do with all the other so called “features'’. I am told that I will discover new uses once I actually start using one; I am not so sure. I think the “smart” word used to describe all these phones is more because manufacturers have very smartly made us think these are necessities. Buying a phone that costs a bomb is definitely not smart spending, but I am known as a cheap ass anyway, so... Despite all this, I am quite sure I will end up getting one of these in the coming year given that my BlackBerry will soon be 4 years old – I only have to figure out how to get one cheaply or better still, get somebody else to pay for it. I also need a new laptop given that the current one I use at home is 5 1/2 yrs old, but the new one will probably be a low end one and / or refurbished – just right to check emails, surf the internet and watch stuff on YouTube.<br />
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<i><b>News anchors who think they are more important than the news…</b></i><br />
I avoid watching Times Now, CNN IBN and NDTV 24x7 most evenings. Mainly because these news channels, instead of focusing on the news (isn’t that their main purpose in life anyway?), are fixated on their celebrity news anchors. I am afraid that if I get a prolonged dose of Arnab Goswami’s pompous, condescending, arrogant, holier than thou, self righteous pontification, I may just pick up the nearest object I find and throw it at the television screen. Same goes for Rajdeep Sardesai and Barkha Dutt, perhaps to some lesser degree (I mean, is it really possible for Arnab to have serious competition?).<br />
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<i><b>… and news channels who make it impossible to actually follow the news</b></i><br />
The other reason I try to avoid watching any news channel is because I am afraid I will suffer from Attention Deficit Disorder or ADD. Seriously, can you really keep a track of the 9 things that news channels have on the TV screen at any point in time? There is the ad ticker on the bottom of the screen, then the news ticker above it, the headline ticker above that followed by the picture descriptor, the stock market ticker in the lower right corner, the weather update in the lower left, the “coming up next” blurb in the top left corner, the news anchor / visual in the middle of the screen and finally, some other blurb in the top right corner. Plus there is the news channel logo and TV service provider logo obfuscating portions of the screen. If you can actually stay on top of all this, then you are a candidate for popping Adderall or Ritalin for the rest of your life and scrambling your brain in the process.<br />
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<b><i>People who think Government intervention is the solution to anything</i></b><br />
Kids can’t get admission to college – blame the government for not setting up enough colleges. Too much violence and sex on TV? Let the government deal with it. And in case you didn’t know smoking was bad for your health, the government will do that as well – in fact, it will do it at every opportunity it gets when you are watching a TV program full of sex, violence and of course, people smoking cigarettes. As a people, we seem to have forgotten the concept of personal responsibility. Your kids didn’t get admission to a good college? You should have ensured they studied hard. Don’t like what you see on the TV? Change channels or switch it off. And in a perverse “where there is a law, there is a loophole” joke, any scene on TV or in movies depicting smoking requires a warning but its perfectly alright to show somebody drinking booze all through the show (see Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani).<br />
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I can think of some more stuff but enough of a rant at this time. Have a wonderful 2014.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7985890367826743936.post-47433245122996054792013-12-15T06:42:00.000+00:002013-12-25T23:55:24.994+00:00This is a task for Obvious Man–Dec 15, 2013 EditionI picked up today’s Deccan Chronicle at the local Café Coffee Day, not because I am a big fan but because it was free (duh!). And with my birthday a day away, I thought it would be a good idea to check out my birthday forecasts.<br />
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This is what Aparna Bose had to say for Sagittarians -<br />
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~ Make sure you follow through on whatever you start instead of leaving projects half way<br />
~ Avoid getting into confrontations with your boss<br />
~ Those with a loan to pay off need to be careful with finances<br />
~ Work on maintaining a good equation with colleagues and junior staff especially during stressful moments<br />
~ Look at how you can improve presentation skills<br />
~ Pay attention the signals your body sends you, especially when it comes to eating habits<br />
~ Those above 35 should gift themselves a complete health check-up every year<br />
~ Drink enough water and avoid soft drinks & packaged juice<br />
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Her more generic forecast -<br />
~ Preparation for any meeting needs to be done in a systematic & meticulous manner<br />
~ Think from multiple perspectives to get the best possible options<br />
~ Your boss might want to have a look at any client presentation and you must ensure all data is accurate<br />
~ If you invest in a rental property, make sure the building in tenant friendly<br />
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And her last contribution in the form of “karmic” tips, one per sun sign -<br />
~ Do not worry too much about other people’s opinions<br />
~ Don’t lose your temper over small matters<br />
~ Do not value others’ opinion beyond a point<br />
~ Think before you speak or act<br />
~ Confide only in people you know you can trust<br />
~ Do not bite off more than you can chew<br />
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And since Deccan Chronicle believes in giving even more value for money on Sundays, here is Jonathan Cainer weighing in with his birthday forecast for Sagittarius. I mean, when the headline reads “Uranus heralds a revelation”, you have to read it, right?<br />
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“If it really is a mountain, why is there a little furry mole with tiny beady eyes, at the top? And how come, when you stand tall, it become nothing more than a minor mound on the ground? Mountains don’t change size, regardless of how we may alter our sense of perspective. They look big from a distance, and they look big up close. Even if we fly up in a plane and look down on them, they still seem pretty darned big. Your current challenge only seems big when you are feeling small. You can easily rise above it this week.”<br />
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WTF? Seriously?? These people get paid for this? And people actually pay Jonathan Cainer to read this stuff on his website? I am clearly in the wrong profession. Its time to call Obvious Man!<br />
<a href="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-1P6FXnwsRmg/Uq1Weif3LGI/AAAAAAAAAFo/cbasxbUOqwM/s1600-h/Obviousman%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img alt="Obviousman" border="0" height="244" src="http://lh3.ggpht.com/-D2z56E9DGBI/Uq1Wfbow-cI/AAAAAAAAAFw/NNqNrfseHwU/Obviousman_thumb.jpg?imgmax=800" style="background-image: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-width: 0px; border-top-width: 0px; display: inline; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;" title="Obviousman" width="138" /></a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7985890367826743936.post-48371167762665702222013-12-13T06:30:00.000+00:002013-12-27T06:26:51.083+00:00As seen in Chennai–Dec 12, 2013 edition<p>Seating in the back seat of a Fast Track cab on the way to Taj Connemara, my eyes wandered -</p> <p> </p> <p>1. Sign outside an Ayurvedic clinic in Mylapore – “We specialise in Arthritis, Diabetes, Impotence, Gas Problems”. If anybody can help me understand the link between the latter two, I would be grateful.</p> <p> </p> <p>2. Sign outside a bike mechanic’s shop – “We phix all types geeyars, breaks, claches”</p> Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7985890367826743936.post-46663494319117030052013-09-02T21:32:00.003+01:002013-09-02T21:32:40.949+01:00People watching in the Lufthansa lounge in Mumbai1. Fat girl, maybe around 10-12, wearing a tiara over a dress full of
glitter with an even fatter mother (oh, and just noticed the girl is
wearing a sash that reads "Hey, its my birthday!". WTF?)<br /><br />2. 6-yr
old boy with poop dripping out of his pants and the lounge staff
searching for the parents (they were busy pouring the booze)<br /><br />3. Single, old guy (around 50-55) trying to check how far his finger would go in his nose<br /><br />4. Quiet older sardar who has been drinking for the last 3 hours<br /><br />5. Tired lounge attendant desperate to see us get out in a few minutes so that she can go home tooUnknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7985890367826743936.post-24841557151201828752013-03-13T05:55:00.001+00:002013-12-27T06:26:51.079+00:00As seen in... Chennai~ A pediatric dentist has named his clinic "Pedo Planet". WTF?? Isn't this genius aware of what the name implies???
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~ Central Bank of India is offering a new product - Comp Exam loan; basically a loan for paying the fees of coaching classes for competitive exams. Seriously though, how expensive are these classes that a loan is needed? I am clearly in the wrong business!Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7985890367826743936.post-84159904921506837282013-01-26T11:42:00.000+00:002013-01-26T11:44:41.843+00:00Customer service is alive…<p>Took me over a year to finally start posting, must be the “new year resolution” effect. Anyway, now that I have started…</p> <p> </p> <p>Most consumers in India, myself included, believe customer service simply doesn’t exist in the country. Rarely do we experience it, probably because most people who get a chance to serve a customer don’t know what it means and most consumers have accepted its absence as something you live with in India. There are, of course, a few exceptions and I met one today.</p> <p> </p> <p>I am on my way for a short international business trip. As per the policy of my employer, they issue the necessary foreign exchange in advance to take care of expenses. For the sake of convenience, I pick it up before departure at the airport. Well… today I forgot. Maybe because I didn’t sleep well last night or maybe because I am taking a flight from Bangalore instead of my home base of Chennai. In any case, I forgot and realized it only after I cleared security. Thanks to increasingly tight (and sometimes downright illogical) security rules, I was told by the inspector there that there was no way I could go back, collect the money and return to the departure area. I thought it made no sense as I would have been checked by the security guys again anyway. But then I was trying to explain logic to a government employee in uniform. Anyway, the only way out was to have an airline staffer escort me through security and bring me back.</p> <p> </p> <p>I called my contact in Thomas Cook asking him if he could ask his local guy to come through security and hand over the money to me (easier for him as somebody who works at the airport). But because it’s a holiday, they only had one person manning the store.</p> <p> </p> <p>Long story short, I finally found an airline staffer who patiently listened to my story and immediately agreed to help me. Less than 10 minutes later, I was back at the gate. He was helpful throughout in negotiating with the security guys, the immigration check personnel and whoever else needed an explanation. He even offered to carry my bag, which it made it sort of awkward. And then he waited on the other side of security until I cleared it to ensure I don’t encounter any last mile hiccups. I offered to treat him to a coffee at the Café Coffee Day, but he very graciously refused.</p> <p> </p> <p>The intention of starting this blog was to give a voice to the cynic who lives within me. I am happy that I encountered something that not only tempered that cynicism a bit (probably temporarily :-)) but gave me a positive story to kick off posting.</p> <p> </p> <p>Dear Rajeshwar, thanks again!</p> Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7985890367826743936.post-11213493179177430542012-01-01T02:46:00.002+00:002012-01-01T02:46:08.734+00:00A new year, a new blogI have been told I can be opinionated at times. So I thought - why not spout them off? Hence this blog. These are just my opinions and not meant to be taken as comments or judgements about anybody in particular.<br />
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Anyway, have a great new year. If you have any bouquets or brickbats on what I have to say here, let me know.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com